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Later, as I lay in bed, my mind began to regroup. I knew I had reason to be angry, but my emotions were running high, I could feel my heartbeat rise, and I had a hard time solidifying the core reason for my frustration.
I know I am making an assumption when I say most people have been in the situation where they FEEL frustration, but they can’t make a rational argument that explains why they feel the way they do.
It honestly took about an hour of systematically going through the evening in my mind until it started coming together. I had to check my emotions regularly to make sure I was fair to both parties. Even though I was upset, I had to keep in mind that my goal was to grow closer to Jeff through the conflict, not apart. I kept praying until I was able to write down in a few sentences why I got angry. Now, I felt peace, and I was able to fall asleep.
Confronting the problem
The next day when I went to talk to Jeff, I knew what my goal was. My goal was NOT to make him feel bad so that he would say sorry but to create room for honesty and do it with love and grace. My goal was in my own hands; to take responsibility for my emotions.
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